Our on the spot reporter with an on the spot report.

HEINKEKEN COSTS £3.50 PER PINT AT STAMFORD BRIDGE. PERSON WHO LIVES IN LONDON UNSURPRISED.

Yes, it's true, the price of a pint of lager at the game last night was £3.50. Which is about as much as I pay down the local for a pint of Fosters. Which, for once, makes something at Chelsea underpriced.

As for the game, if that is what people think is an improvement then I would genuinely have hated to see the Sunderland and Stoke games. OK, I appreciate that players have to be rested, Jussi and SuperKev are quite possibly the most important players in the team and I know that Big Sam rested players in the year we got to the final, but Lee and Cohen have played themselves into the team and we are still at the beginning of the season. This was a big game, a chance to put one over a big four side and we had a chance, albeit slim, of making it to Wembley. A wasted opportunity.

Of the players who came in, Al-Habsi could have possibly done better with a couple of goals, little Davies was non-existent and Steinsson was rightly taken off at half time. Only Kidneys seemed to be up for the game. As for the regular starters, I can only say yes, Zat Knight really is that crap.

However the fans were excellent, a lot of standing went on with a lot of stewards not earning their money. The Chelsea fans were outsung, which isn't hard as they didn't sing at all. As my season ticket holding, Chelsea supporting mucker, who didn't go to the game but met in the pub afterwards said: "Tourists".

As for the manager, it did feel quite surreal being 3-0 down and singing his name. Irony or truth, you be the judge.

As for the papers:

Gary Megson's team were never at the races. The Currant

Bolton's damage-limitation exercise had clearly not worked The Mirror

Chelsea never looked like missing out on a place in the last eight of the Carling Cup. The Nazi

This comfortable rolling over of hapless Bolton. The Express

Bolton offered little resistance. The Tory

Chelsea show class in easing way past Bolton’s pussycats. The Times

There was something almost contemptuous about the way they dismissed Bolton last night. The Indy

This was a breeze. The Granuiad

Forget swine flu - Bolton were caught cold by a bad dose of Kalou at Stamford Bridge. The M.E.N.

On this evidence, Wanderers might well be pig sick of the sight of Chelsea by the end of the week. The former B.E.N.

Bless the local papers to bring in a bit of comedy....anyway to today's guest publication:

They were able to sweep Bolton aside, without playing at full pelt. The London Free Paper (formerly The Standard)

Finally, and in the current spirit of entente cordiale, a quick word from the GSO:

“The fans were terrific, full stop. It was 4-0 and they were still singing, and we need that."

Fence repairing a-go-go.

Until sometime tomorrow, fellow masochists.