Cheerio...

Well, at least we can start with some good news. Burnley, the team with the sourest of sour grapes, are not much longer for the Premier League. A drubbing at home to Liverpool showing that they just weren't good enough and that their manager made the correct decision to leave and become our manager. Good bye, good riddance, don't come back soon. As for my letter for Mr Collymore, it's currently being sent back by the Talk Sport email guard as "ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! Muppet!!!" is considered to be just a touch too nasty for his poor little eyes.

However, on to yesterday's game. The problem seems to be pretty simple, so simple it will only take a few bullet points.

1. This was a team that are obviously already on the beach. To lose a two goal lead to the worst team in the league is nigh on treasonable. To go with the performance last week, there is definitely some work to be done by the manager over the summer, including....

2. The need for a striker who can, well, strike. The stats don't lie. Fourteen shots, ten on target, eight of them direct at David James. The answer to our scoring problem is not to take Kidneys off and put the misfiring Swede on. It's finding someone who can put the ball either side of the keeper.

3. Let's hope that, if and when Bolton tell all his suitors where to go, someone can actually introduce Gary "Gaz" Cahill to Zat Knight. Great apart, abysmal together.

4. While he is pre season training with The Arse, Mr Wenger can advise Little Jack that he isn't that good enough yet to take on a whole team. Yes he set up a goal, yes he was close to setting up another at the end, he just has to know when to hold or give at the right time, to paraphrase New Order. His dallying on the ball led directly to Portsmouth scoring.

The season is in danger of ending with a whimper, not a bang. Spurs next week could turn into one of the worst days of my life, if Mrs X lets me go, and then the Brum game might as well be played on a park. The manager should make it clear to the players that how they perform over the next two games could determine whether they will be at T'Reebok next season. Never mind the list from earlier in the week, at the moment you could probably count on one hand the players that, on yesterday's showing, deserve to be wearing the white next year.

Plus I had a fiver on 2-0, the mugs.

Until tomorrow, does anyone know a Burnley fan who needs directions to Scunthorpe?