Snooze....

Not much going on the wild world of Bolton Wanderers today, which isn't to say that we haven't got any musings and in no way shape or form will we be padding up this edition with long, superfluous sentences that seem to meander away like a slow river, not going anywhere until they stop somewhere in The Cotswolds.

After some bartering, the Spurs replay will be played next Wednesday after T'Trotters agreed to move the Blackburn game to Sunday, meaning an early rise for all the soap dodgers. This will obviously mean that the takings in all of Blackburn pubs will be hit, what with them having to get straight back from the game for their weekly iron bath, whether they need it or not. Of the game, which we will naturally win, more later this week.

Tomorrow we visit our nearest neighbours and attempt to come away with something that has largely eluded us since Wigan bought their way into the Premier League. One win and one draw at the Whatevertheyarecallingitthisseason Stadium since Wigan were promoted is not a good enough return, especially as we regularly end up above them at the end of the season. Of course, the most infamous game came a couple of years ago when the Bolton team phoned in a performance so insipid, Bolton Council were flooded with complaints the Monday after under the Trades Description Act and RyanAir flew some fans back for gratis in sympathy.

Of course, that is gone now and our saviour has been talking about the game. Managing to sound authorative on the subject as well as stating that bleeding obvious (again) he says

Wednesday is a massive game for both clubs - there is no doubt about that. No one likes to be in the bottom three and the only way to get out of that is to win matches

Now we at the Towers love St Owen. We have a St Owen mug, a St Owen towel, eat off a St Owen plate and sleep under a St Owen duvet while Mrs X sleeps in the spare room under her Stevie G one. However, the monotony of this is beginning to grate. We all know it's a massive game, we all know the next six games are against teams in the bottom half and we all know that they won't be easy (the Burnley game saw to that). If St Owen ever leaves football, maybe Parliament should come calling as he manages to keep you informed without telling you anything you don't already know.

He has also told the misfiring Swede to keep trying with this titbit of coaching for when in front of goal

As simple as it sounds, you have to maintain your level of composure.

This reminds me of the time that Mrs X told me that she had cancelled something under my name, using my phone and imitating my voice. As simple as it sounds, I had to maintain my composure as well, helped by five double JD's in the local after I had stormed out. Of course, years later we are still together, so there must be an analogy there somewhere. Suffice to say, as big as my lungs are for shouting expletives at the television, my breath will not be held.

The manager has confirmed the return of Little Jack and The Transylvanian, whilst holding out hope that Zat will be back. Hopefully the only change will be Wilshere for Taylor, as well as Matty played on Sunday, with Wilshere being given free rein to fly at Bramble. We don't mean fly literally or anything, only one player can have jets for heels and we have him on loan from Citeh.

Other than this, apparently Gary "Gaz" Cahill's blood clot isn't as bad as feared. This follows last week's update that his blood clot isn't as bad as feared and the weekend's news that Cahill's blood clot isn't as bad as feared. Apparently on Wednesday we'll be told that Gary Cahill's blood clot isn't as bad as feared. Let's hope so, I don't know what I'd do without the continuous updates.

Until tomorrow, what's got Billy so spooked?